Do you ever look at what someone else has and think, I wish I had that? Or, I wish I made that amount of money or had that car or that job or lifestyle in general? No matter what anyone else has, YOU can have a great life, too. It may not be exactly what the other person has, but you must work for what you want out of this life.
The simple fact of why no one should compare themselves to anyone is because no one is you. Even if someone else has had the same experience as you, that does not mean they are YOU. Every single person is on a different path than you. Even if someone else did the exact same things as you, that person still speaks and thinks differently.
You never REALLY know what the person you compare yourself to is really going through-their struggles, stress, etc. What that person’s life looks like to you or the outside world may be completely different behind closed doors.
Build your own life. Do things that make you happy and proud because you only get ONE life. Instead of comparing yourself to this person, ask them how they became successful-showing that you admire someone else’s hard work can be very humbling.
Tip: One of the things I love doing is following my favorite influencers on social media-specifically Instagram because they share SO MUCH about their life! They share everything from what they eat, workouts, other influencers/friends they love, to what they did to make themselves successful-even if it’s just changing their mindset.
No one wakes up one day and is successful, it takes time. We must realize that we are all on our own journey and be inspired by others to do the best we can ❤
Happy Monday! Follow me on IG & Facebook at @stylestomakeyousmile
Yesterday, I sat outside and watched two young girls walk up to the top of a waterfall. One climbed to the top of the waterfall quickly, and then fled down waiting for the other girl. The other girl took her time getting to the top, moving carefully, when she got to the top she felt the water and then slowly made her way down and ran to catch up with the other girl.
When I was the girls age (around 10-12), I remember being like the first girl who climbed the waterfall quickly, who had no fear. Around this age my cousin instilled fearlessness in me as he told me he’d only ride roller coasters with me if I were to ride in the front seat. I didn’t want to say no, so I did it and from then on rode the front seat of every. single. rollercoaster. Before I was the girls age, I was very shy. But growing up in the country made me want to explore everything and be fearless.
So, as I sat there yesterday watching the girls I thought, when did I lose that fearlessness? When did I let growing up in this world change my perception from fearless to fearful? The answer: it’s because of all the negative experiences I’ve had personally or have seen happen to others that have made me fearful.
To combat fear, we must change our mindset to know that not every bad experience will replay in our lives. We need to have people in our lives who’ll tell us not to be afraid or we will never be free.
To those young girls, I hope they continue to walk this world fearless even if one is timid than the other-she still followed the fearless girl, which means she can be fearless on her own ❤
Have you ever had a REALLY bad day, and someone recognized it and did something nice for you unexpectedly? Or have you walked into work and there was a nice note left for you written by a coworker and friend? Or have you received a text from a loved one that says, Have a great day!
It’s those unexpected small gestures that make a big impact on us. Even if a bad experience happened there are always ways to get through them. So, remember what those people who care for you, have done on a bad day or wanted to start your morning with a smile. Pass this on by doing the same for someone else. Send an I Love You text, especially to someone who is going through a rough time right now. Send a card in the mail to your friend who lives far away that says you’re thinking of them.
Remember, to do the same for yourself too, buy pretty flowers to keep in your home and put them where you’ll see them every morning before work, write yourself a note on pretty paper, keep notes from loved ones and hang them on a board where you can see them daily. Any of these will keep you remembering you are loved, happy and that you can make it through the week.
This weekend I listened to a podcast called Goal Digger hosted by Jenna Kutcher episode 118: What Nastia Liukin Learned After Her Gold Medal. Nastia is a Russian American former gymnast. The number one takeaway I learned from this podcast was the lesson Nastia’s parents taught her in wanting to quit. Whenever she would have a bad day, she’d tell her parents she wanted to quit and her parents would say to her, Okay, but not today. I can totally relate to this feeling of wanting to be done with something when I’ve had a bad day, feel overworked, tired, mentally drained, etc. Once Nastia would have a good day her parents would say, Okay now you can quit. Have you ever told yourself you can quit something on a GOOD day? After hearing this on the podcast I realized this is such a great technique of reverse psychology. I’ve never thought to quit something on a good day. This goes to show what a positive and negative mindset can do for a person on a good and bad day.
So, the next time you want to quit something on a bad day, give yourself a break for the rest of the night, don’t focus on quitting, focus on bringing your mind elsewhere and staying present. And, when you have a good day, come back to the day you thought about quitting and this should make you realize if you REALLY want to quit. Everything you do will make more sense with a clear mind.
Have you ever told yourself you can quit something on a good day? Also, if you’d like to hear the entire episode from the podcast, visit iTunes and search Goal Digger.
I spent the other night looking at photos from the past 5 years and found myself comparing my life then to what it is now. When looking back those years feel like a dream because my life is so different than before.
I thought to myself, what if someone new came into my life and looked through photos of my past? While I realized they’d know more about my past without any explanation from me, I also realized what happened then doesn’t define who I am now.
Every experience and challenge has shaped me into who I am today. This is the same for anyone, we are not who we are yesterday if we choose. But that’s the key, we have to choose who we want to be-that’s our reality. Defined by our experiences and left to dwell on the past? Or take the lessons from the past and move on, keep going and stay positive.
So, what days will you choose to have?
Last week, I posted a picture of me on my Instagram at Pure Barre, ready for class and received a lot of positive feedback so I thought I’d share more today. Here’s what I wrote in the comments on IG:
“I’ve found the best way to be body positive is to be mindful of the workout I’m doing rather than focus on my weight or giving up during class. I know the more classes I attend and the healthier I eat my body will adjust to being tone.
When you find a workout you’re passionate about it’ll make wanting to workout easier.”
Many people found the message inspiring and I hope you do too! I’ve learned that every time you enter the doors of a gym, studio or decide to workout on your own-you’re far from giving up. I’ve also learned that there’s a difference between giving up from exhaustion and giving up mentally. You need to fight the mental saying of “I can’t” and keep going because if you’re in a class, the class doesn’t stop so if you stop because you tell yourself you can’t do something you’ll only stop to get back up. But if you stop from exhaustion it’s okay to give yourself a break.
As far as weight goes, if you’re attending classes regularly and eating healthy the weight will come off, just be patient.
How do you deal with body positivity?
What would you do if you had all the time in the day to do anything you wanted? Would you start a new hobby or work on one the one you’re currently doing, travel, workout, spend time with loved ones.
Did you know that we spend our free time doing exactly what we want (within our means)? Whether we need a break to just watch a movie/TV show or scroll through social media. But what if you could turn that time around and spend it doing something that will make you really happy? What if you spent that time doing one of the things mentioned above and it inspired you to start something new?
Sometimes when we take a break, it will inspire us to be more creative. Thoughts will come pouring in about what we should be doing. All we have to do is listen to them and then take action. Whatever that thing was that came to mind was there for a reason and it’s telling us that this is what we want. Maybe it’s to travel to another country, go visit a friend in another state, join a group that interests you, start a new career or move to new state.
If you decide to move forward with your thoughts, make a plan to execute, save money if needed and see where it takes you! Once you get there, write down your thoughts from how spending this time doing what you wanted made you feel and recognize if it’s something you’d do again.
How do you make use of your time? Has something inspiring ever come to you where you listened to it and it changed you? Please let me know in the comments!
Being mindful starts with having a clear mind. So, how do you achieve a clear mind? By making time to do so and by not thinking about what is bothering you but rather acknowledge it and do something mindful for a while. Mindfulness is also being present of your surroundings and of your own self. If a situation you’re in is difficult-a hard workout routine or a difficult time in your life-try to remind yourself you’re going to get past it by remembering that it won’t last forever. In the end whatever you’re going through is a lesson and will make your mind stronger.
You can achieve mindfulness by telling yourself that you’re going to do an activity at a set time. This should calm your mind down from any stress you’re currently having.
Some of the things I enjoy doing to clear my mind include: taking a walk, working out, listening to podcasts, reading books or blog posts. While all of these do clear my mind of stress or negative thoughts, I’m also learning along the way. Listening to a podcast while doing a mindless task like washing dishes means I can focus on what the podcasters are talking about.
I know that some people love working out in the morning and I can totally see why, it’s a great way to get energized for the day (I do this on Saturdays)! I’ve always loved working out at night because I go directly from work to working out. This means I can focus my mind on things like: what the teacher is showing me to do, what everyone around me is doing and what I’m doing. The workout routine is difficult, but being mindful that it won’t last forever and that the results will show my hard work helps to keep my mind positive. Working out helps to clear my mind of work stress that I would have otherwise carried with me on the drive home. For the nights that I’m not working out, I’ll come home and put on a podcast to listen to, to relieve my mind from work or stress.
Any way that you can become more mindful of your current situation is going to make you have a stronger will power to get through anything. When this happens, you’ll be more determined to take on new challenges.
How do you stay mindful? Do you have any tips on being mindful or what you enjoy doing to clear your mind?
There is always something that we wish we could do more of but people will tell you they don’t have time to do so. So, how you make time to do the things you love?
Replacing the words, “I don’t have time” to “I’ll make time” can help anyone get in the right mindset of making positive choices for their life today. The things you put off because you don’t have time, try to put into perspective, how long is the thing you don’t have time for really going to take? Fifteen minutes? A half hour? An hour? Once you’ve recognized how long it will take, figure out a time frame that fits into your day.
Decide today that tomorrow you will wake up and do whatever it is you claim you don’t have time for. Whether that means you need to wake up earlier, take a break from the TV or social media, do whatever it takes to get it done.
Today, you can write what it is you want to get done in your calendar for tomorrow which will hold you accountable because you’ve written it down-this is all about visualizing that what you’ve planned for tomorrow IS GOING TO HAPPEN. Visualization is a key component to realizing your goals.
Lastly, hold yourself to your promise that you will spend the time it takes do what you’ve written down. Making time for yourself is so important because it shapes who you are and who you want to become. You then go from a vision of saying this is what I keep claiming I don’t have time for, to I’m making the time to do it, and look what I just accomplished! Keep writing down things you want to get done in your calendar so you can achieve more of your goals.
What are some things you need to make time for? Please let me know in the comments!
On my Facebook Page-Styles To Make You Smile, I’ve shared a video of actress Lisa Kudrow discussing her life story of how she was hired to work on the TV show Frasier but then was fired and after many auditions landed Friends. What I learned from her story is that you should always keep going no matter what path you’re on. She got up every single day, continuing to go to auditions which means she stayed on the path of being an actress and not giving up because it’s what she loved doing.
It can be easy to believe that the path you see for yourself is the only one that should work out. But sometimes receiving disappointments along your journey can be right for you, but it’s all about how you look at it. If you keep going and continuing to do things that make yourself happy then you will eventually find yourself doing what you love. In the end, Lisa realized that it was a good thing she’d gotten fired from Frasier otherwise she’d never be on Friends. So, the next time something doesn’t work out, keep on facing the day to strive for something new. Eventually, you’ll find where you’re meant to be. ❤