Tag: Motivation

Motivational Monday: Don’t Fake It Till You Make It. Be Yourself And You’ll Make It.

In the first half of my career I heard the saying, Fake It Till You Make It, and because of this I HATE this saying. Let’s be honest does anyone REALLY enjoy being fake? No. If you don’t know how to do something, learn, research, ask, do anything BUT pretend you know what you’re doing. If you don’t know how to do something just admit it (I had no idea what I was doing when I started this blog, but I learned and never pretended I knew).

While growing up I was a huge victim of not asking people for help. I never told myself I would “fake it” I was just either too stubborn or embarrassed to ask for help. In my current position I get thrown into a LOT of situations where I have to learn how to do things from the ground up. So now, reframing from my old self I will ask every. single. question that comes to my mind because I realize I need to learn and grow. I’ve sometimes been on the phone with people for hours learning until it makes sense to me. And I can’t thank those people enough for helping me ❤ So I guess you can say I’ve grown out of my stubbornness.

In the world we live in it can be hard to stand out so sometimes people tend to follow what others are doing-they are being fake to themselves because they think what the other people are doing is best and it’s what’s working for them so why not follow them instead of being yourself. DON’T DO THIS. The WORST thing you can do for yourself is to NOT be yourself. YOU have a talent that you are supposed to share with the world, so SHARE IT. No one has the gift you do, whether that is teaching, writing, designing, coaching, cooking, etc. No one else is you. People like certain people because they are being themselves-genuine, real and vulnerable.

Having confidence in yourself and being fake are two completely different things. Confident people don’t have to “fake” something instead they’ll ask for help. Eventually being fake will grow old. If you’re following what everyone else is doing and they all decide to do something you don’t like, will you continue to be like them? Or will you have the courage to stand on your own and be yourself?

I hope if you are reading this message and can recognize that you aren’t being yourself, that you will show people who you are with your own special gift and break free from being fake. No more Fake It Till You Make It. Be Yourself and You’ll Make It. Happy Monday! ❤

Motivational Monday: Limiting Beliefs

Limiting beliefs are the lies we hear and tell ourselves, but it is up to us to not to listen to them. There are limiting beliefs in the world that you can only do so much. Sometimes people will tell you what’s best for you because that’s all they know. However, if you decide to expand your mind, learn new things and trust yourself, you’ll know there are no limits to what you can do. On the other hand, the limits we tell ourselves are true are there because of what we say to ourselves- “I can’t do…insert activity here.” For a long time, I told myself I couldn’t hold a plank for 90 seconds while working out. Why? Because it was hard. I limited myself. Why? Because it was easier than dealing with the pain that comes with working out. Yet, I continued to go to class four times a week, and you know what? I CAN hold a plank. I changed my mindset around the belief that I couldn’t do something to telling myself I can. And I have strong teachers who push me to do my best during class. To be honest, I don’t want to disappoint them much less myself. All of this has helped me realize, you motivate yourself first then you need to be around the people who motivate you.

In the newest thirty second Nike Ad, a women age 81 was told she was crazy for running a marathon. But guess what? She did it anyway. Why? Because she believed in herself even when no one else did. The point is you don’t have to believe everything everyone tells you. Her mantra in life is Why Not and her thoughts to those people who told her she was crazy is, “But that’s the great thing about being old. I can just pretend not to hear them.” I hope at 81 I can still be as active as her and still pretend not to hear any limiting beliefs put on by myself or others.

What you need to do to gain confidence, is push their words out of your mind. Instead of telling yourself what THEY say, tell yourself what YOU say. YOU’RE the only one who knows what you’re capable of. Once you begin to show everyone around you how confident you are and that you can do whatever it is they are saying you can’t or shouldn’t, they’ll change their minds. Put positive words and mantras in your mind and the limiting beliefs you have within yourself will start to fade.

**Remember: Time will always be there, you just have to decide when you’re going to believe in yourself, even at age 81.

What are some limiting beliefs you’ve told yourself or that you’ve heard from others?

Motivational Monday: I believe… I know…

I believe in wearing white after Labor Day.

I know being the best version of yourself means you’re happy.

I believe to be happy you must spend time with yourself to learn what you enjoy and listen to what you want and don’t want anymore.

I know it’s important to take yourself on vacation and treat yourself with good food, shopping and hotel. Don’t let anyone tell you differently.

I believe you should always continue to learn, it’s how you’ll become successful. I also believe in mentors-I’d never be as successful as I am without them.

I know that changing yourself is always best.

I know you learn the most about yourself when you’re alone and try new things.

I believe when given a challenge you must take it and not complain, there’s a reason the person giving you the challenge believes you can do it, it’s because they believe in you.

I know that if you are tired of being the person you used to be that you’ll find a way to change yourself. Unhappiness gets old. And when you tell yourself you don’t want to be sad anymore, you’ll do what you can to change.

I believe you need to do what’s best for you.

I know confidence comes with a combination of standing up for yourself and finding the right people to guide you.

I know spending time with loved one’s is one of the most important things in this world because you don’t know when anyone’s time is done.

I believe that death can give you a push to make you realize your dreams. It reminds you how very little time we all have here.

What are some things you believe and know in life? Please share them with me in the comments below or on social media, at @stylestomakeyousmile

Dreams of a 32 Year Old

Dreams of a 32-Year-Old,

If there is one thing I’ve realized going into my 32nd year of life, it’s that dreams can change as you age and that is not necessarily a bad thing.

When I was in 3rd grade, my teacher had the class share what we wanted to be when we grew up. Most said, a teacher, vet or doctor. I said Princess. Clearly, I will never be a real princess, but if there is one thing I know, it’s that I can be a princess in my own way-I can build my life how I want. I can spend every day doing what I want-going to a job I enjoy, blogging about things that make me happy and help others, working out, eating foods that make me feel good, spending my money on things that bring me joy and spending time with people I love.

I’ve done a LOT of work on myself this year from going to therapy, listening to multiple podcasters talk about how to better yourself-to define success for yourself and go for your dreams. These women have made me realize that the only way to be successful is to work hard. Before starting my blog, I was lazy on the weekends and had no ambition and cared too much about what everyone else was doing without me. But now that I put in the effort to do something I enjoy, it’s taken the place of that negative space that was overgrowing with sadness.
I have also learned that treating myself to a vacation away from my everyday life is MUCH NEEDED. Earlier in the year, I thought I’d take a solo trip to Florida and lay by the ocean all week, but because Style Collective was having a conference I decided to take a full four days to NYC where I’d attend the conference, go to see a Broadway play, stay at a really nice hotel and eat in new restaurants. The point of the trip was to push myself outside of my comfort zone and this DEF. did! I decided on the conference over a beach vacation because I knew I’d grow more as a person-I’d learn more on the blogging industry, meet new people and learn to be okay with being out of my comfort zone.

Side Note: Now that I’m older I LOVE to learn! Learning from others is one of the greatest gifts especially when it comes to bettering yourself. ❤
Stop living in the past and live life day to day. I’ve learned that the worst thing you can do for yourself is stay stuck in yesterday, a year ago or five years ago. If an old memory that makes you uncomfortable appears online, don’t look at it, if you see a person who only brought you down, don’t engage with them, if someone is constantly questioning your personal life, give them a vague answer if you don’t want to get into it. Staying in the present comes down to knowing yourself. If you know something you see, or a conversation will upset you then don’t look at it or walk away from it. It’s the only way you will grow as a person.

What my dream (much like what society says) used to be was having a perfect house, relationship, family, career and at 32 I’m not even close to most of that. But you know what? I’m okay with the life I do have because I know that my life is what I want it to be. Every single day we make decisions on what to do next with our life. For many years, I stayed stuck in the past (and in my old dreams), and now I realize I don’t have to anymore. I can only compare my life to myself and no one else’s.

Cheers to 32! Another year of growth ❤

❤ Always, Amy Beth

What have you learned this year? What was a dream you swapped out for a new one? Let me know in the comments!

Motivational Monday: The Story of Your Life

The other day I realized that everything and everyone has a story. Every dance you watch is telling a story, a book you read tells a story, every song you hear and out of all of those comes from a person who has lived their story and is able to share it.

Sometimes the reason that people can be so successful is because of the story that they have to share with the world. Being relatable to other’s can help people in so many ways. When it comes to my blog I have always told myself that if I can help at least one person with my content then I’m happy. My content is just a story of the world I live in. The way I see and have seen the world in just a short 31 years. I believe that because everyone has such a different view on the world, you should share what you’ve learned with others and be honest about it. By realizing the value in the story, sharing it can open many doors for you.

I believe that in life people just want to be heard, respected and loved. No one wants to be judged but by putting their story out into the world, but you will be. But by doing so you can connect on an emotional level with so many people. So, don’t be afraid to put yourself out their and share what you’ve learned because you don’t know who you’ll help in the process of sharing your story.

Motivational Monday: Struggle Vs. Success

In a world that is comparison overload between social media and everyone judging each other on how people live, we sometimes only focus on other’s success. What we forget to see is the struggle of how the person got their success. Most success isn’t an overnight thing, people work hard to find success in their life-whether it is with their business, relationship, fitness goals or mental health.

A lot of times we only see the best versions of someone’s life and forget that maybe that person who is currently successful may have struggled. Sometimes people choose to share their struggle and when they do it can make them feel relatable, like maybe you’ve gone through a similar situation. And if they decide to share their life it can make other’s judge them less…hopefully.

So, why do we judge people so hard when they’ve found success? Maybe we shouldn’t. Maybe instead we should see their success is coming from a place of hard work and empowerment. Maybe their success is something they’ve been wanting for themselves for YEARS and couldn’t achieve it until now because they were going through a struggle you know nothing about. You truly don’t know anyone until you’ve seen them behind closed doors. If someone shares their struggle with you and you help them then you are adding to their success, maybe without even realizing it.

Be happy for the one’s who’ve found their success and lift up the one’s who are struggling.

Motivational Monday: Show Up For Yourself

This week I had a very busy week-you know the kind, where the days all blend together and by Friday you don’t even realize it’s Friday, until you’re told so and remember you’ll will have the next two days off and know that the work week is over. You mean next week DOES exist? Yes, it does. This means that the work week will always come to end. Anything you’re dealing with during the week, you can take a two-day break from, you just have to mentally show up for yourself to tell yourself that you deserve a break.

So, here’s what I did this weekend to show up: I worked out, I bought myself a new book called Work Party by Jaclyn Johnson and I read the first four chapters while dressed in a t-shirt, comfy capris, next to an open window with the breeze coming through and listened to life going by outside, I caught up with my friends and family, I planned my entire month of September in my planner-I’d be lost without a planner, I made plans with people I love and let go of the week.

Showing up for yourself mentally just means that you need to allow yourself to work through your emotional and mental process of how your week went and then turning it around by allowing yourself to be okay. Anything that you are dealing with will always end if you let it. If you drag it on in your mind, it will haunt you all weekend, so to move past it, you need to give yourself permission to think about what happened for a certain time then for the rest of the day/weekend tell yourself to move on.

There will always be hard times in life and times when things can be brought up from the past, but it’s how we deal with those times in the present to show up for ourselves that matter the most ❤

Say YES to Treating Yourself

Self-love is one of the best feelings in the world. Why? Because it means you’re making time for yourself. What you put out into the world matters, so if you are feeling like you need some alone time to rejuvenate yourself, you should. Your gut will always tell you when you need a break. I think we’ve all been there, when we’re so stressed out and frustrated with everything going on around us that we just need time away to focus and bring positivity back. When we treat ourselves, it means that we can be our best selves to everyone in our lives.

Some of the ways I’ve said yes to myself this year are: scheduling a weekly workout routine, planning dinners, fueling the body with the food it needs to function properly (I’ve done this by trial and error and I always know when my body is needing something different), sleeping on a normal schedule, waking up early and blogging before going into work, communicating with likeminded women online and taking myself on vacation.

Have you tried any of these as self-care? Have they worked for you?

Say YES to yourself every single day, whether that is by doing one of the things listed above or reading a book or laying in a bath while listening to a podcast or taking a walk. When we take time to drown out what everyone around us is doing and listen to ourselves, you will be able to hear yourself speak about the things you REALLY want to pursue. Once you begin to hear yourself think, GO DO IT. I promise you won’t regret it. Once you unleash your ideas your mind will be focused on how you can create what’s been in your mind all along.

Happy Monday! ❤

Motivational Monday: Don’t Compare, Be Inspired

Do you ever look at what someone else has and think, I wish I had that? Or, I wish I made that amount of money or had that car or that job or lifestyle in general? No matter what anyone else has, YOU can have a great life, too. It may not be exactly what the other person has, but you must work for what you want out of this life.

The simple fact of why no one should compare themselves to anyone is because no one is you. Even if someone else has had the same experience as you, that does not mean they are YOU. Every single person is on a different path than you. Even if someone else did the exact same things as you, that person still speaks and thinks differently.

You never REALLY know what the person you compare yourself to is really going through-their struggles, stress, etc. What that person’s life looks like to you or the outside world may be completely different behind closed doors.
Build your own life. Do things that make you happy and proud because you only get ONE life. Instead of comparing yourself to this person, ask them how they became successful-showing that you admire someone else’s hard work can be very humbling.

Tip: One of the things I love doing is following my favorite influencers on social media-specifically Instagram because they share SO MUCH about their life! They share everything from what they eat, workouts, other influencers/friends they love, to what they did to make themselves successful-even if it’s just changing their mindset.

No one wakes up one day and is successful, it takes time. We must realize that we are all on our own journey and be inspired by others to do the best we can ❤

Happy Monday! Follow me on IG & Facebook at @stylestomakeyousmile

Motivational Monday: How Small Gestures Make a Big Impact

Have you ever had a REALLY bad day, and someone recognized it and did something nice for you unexpectedly? Or have you walked into work and there was a nice note left for you written by a coworker and friend? Or have you received a text from a loved one that says, Have a great day!

It’s those unexpected small gestures that make a big impact on us. Even if a bad experience happened there are always ways to get through them. So, remember what those people who care for you, have done on a bad day or wanted to start your morning with a smile. Pass this on by doing the same for someone else. Send an I Love You text, especially to someone who is going through a rough time right now. Send a card in the mail to your friend who lives far away that says you’re thinking of them.

Remember, to do the same for yourself too, buy pretty flowers to keep in your home and put them where you’ll see them every morning before work, write yourself a note on pretty paper, keep notes from loved ones and hang them on a board where you can see them daily. Any of these will keep you remembering you are loved, happy and that you can make it through the week.

❤

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