Motivational Monday: The Permission Slip to Life

Have you ever waited for someone to give you permission to start something? I’ll bet you have. And chances are that permission that came from someone else started with an idea you had for yourself. So why do we wait so long to begin something until we have permission or continually ask others if something is good enough before we begin?

Why is it that we wait until we absolutely must do something in order to start? Until the doctor gives us permission to change the diet or to lose a job we hate before starting a job we love. Why can’t we say yes to ourselves? To the things that make us happy. Or knowing what you want to do will take work but make excuses for ourselves that we can’t do something until someone else tells us we can.

Stop letting everyone else give you permission to change your life, and just start. No one else can do the work for you. You must make time for yourself, even if it’s an hour a day. Let that time be your alone time to think about what you want for yourself. Figure out a plan of how to change yourself for the better then start it. Your happiness depends on how hard you work for yourself.
Personally, I often look to others who are already doing things I want to do. Those people will always tell you to start. Start when you have no idea what you’re doing but start because you want to. Trust that you’ll figure things out as you go. Stop waiting for someone else to tell you you’re good enough. A successful person will never look down on you for trying. They’ve been there and understand the work it takes. Everyone has had failures and successes because it’s all part of life.

I’ve also learned that if I don’t start what I want to, I’ll continually think about it repeatedly until starting. I even become angry at myself when I know I can do more. Do you ever feel that way? You have a dream for yourself and spend time avoiding it to take the easy way of life; watching TV instead of exercising, or instead of reading a book, but because you make excuses or are too tired you don’t start. I believe there is a difference in taking time for yourself with self-care and completely avoiding in what you should be starting. It’s easier to avoid than it is to start but I believe that if you start, you’ll be happier, you just have to keep going.

Today, give yourself the permission to say YES to yourself. Today, give yourself permission to believe in yourself instead of seeking approval from others. No one is going to live your life the way you will. You don’t need permission from anyone else other than yourself to start. Once you start, seek out people who’ll support you. You may find people who will criticize you, but just keep going and find people who’ll give you the same permission you give yourself, which is to keep going.

Happy Monday, Loves! ❤

Motivational Monday: Be the Hero of Your Life Not the Victim

I used to spend most of my life being the victim. Anytime anything would go wrong in my life I would be sad for longer than needed, including becoming depressed. But what I’ve realized over the past few years of rebuilding my life by living alone, having great therapists and a good support system of people I trust, is that you deserve to be the hero of your own life. While I have my support systems, I know that I am the only person who can change my life. No one is going to live your life every single day except you. No one can tell you how to live, where to live, pay your bills, do your job, etc. No one is you.

The moment of change for me, was when I recognized that my routine of unhappiness needed to change. By routine I mean, I’d come home from a job I didn’t enjoy, would be tired, constantly thinking negatively, reliving past trauma I’d experienced and go in the shower to be alone and sulk. One night while in this routine, I’d realized I needed to change. I was SICK of being unhappy. My happiness didn’t truly come until now (a few years later) but it only came because I put in the work. I left relationships that made me unhappy, I went to therapy once a week, I wrote love letters to myself to make myself feel better and eventually I moved into my own place, completely alone. I learned how to live with my past, changed jobs, lived in a place I could afford when everyone else told me to live elsewhere. The point is to know what’s best for yourself when you are stuck and can recognize you need to change. If you don’t recognize this within yourself yet, take a look at your daily routine – are you happy with it? Is it fulfilling? If not, then why? What do you NEED to do to make yourself happy? I’ll bet there is a calling within your mind telling you over and over again what you need and until you listen it will be pushed in the back of your mind. I promise when you listen and set yourself free you will feel better. ❤

Everyone needs a hero, and everyone needs themselves to be their own hero. When you stop playing the victim, you’ll open your eyes to an entirely new life. This new life will be one that you’ll never want to give up on or go back to your old ways. It will be so good, you’ll forget your old routine and only focus on your new one. Start small with your new routine, by picking out one thing at a time to change, and once you get a hang of it, try adding something else to it. This could be eating healthy dinners every night, which includes budgeting for meals, meal planning and cooking. Next, start a fitness routine, it is so good to move your body and once you begin this routine, your body will want to move (you’ll realize this after a month of working out or when you happen to miss a class). You can even try small things like listening to a podcast while doing dishes (a great way to learn while working) or playing music (a great way to make yourself happy and dance to move your body). Journal daily about your dreams and find small ways to make those dreams come true. Start with your big dream (the end goal) and work backwards by taking small steps to get there. Know that your dreams take work but that you can make them happen by putting in the work one day at a time.

Introducing small changes in your life means you’ll be changing your habits which will eventually become your routine. Put the work in to make yourself and your happiness a priority, and eventually you’ll realize you don’t have to be a victim to your circumstances, you’re already a hero because you’re devoting yourself to becoming the best version you can possibly be. ❤

Happy Monday, Loves ❤

Motivational Monday: Be the Visionary for Your Life

When I was growing up, I had a vivid imagination. My best friend and I would play in the backyard (which was the woods) and we’d go on adventures, tell stories and act them out. We even created our own radio show with a small tape recorder and microphones. Once I got into third grade, I realized I had a photographic memory that tied into my visual mind. I knew that by looking at something-words or pictures I could remember it. I could close my eyes and see the answers. Another thing I’d learned at a young age was a love for writing. While I struggled with writing back then, it made me work hard to learn how to write properly. I’d always find myself taking out a notebook and writing about my day or keeping a journal to write about the boy(s) I liked. I also would write short stories that I’d imagine in my mind and bring to life on paper. The year I graduated college, I sat at a coffee shop to have lunch by myself and dreamed about interviewing someone for a magazine I had written. Throughout my working life I’d always think about jobs I wished I’d had and thought about all the ways I could provide the company with great ideas. Then, I began reading blogs and realizing that if normal people could write their ideas and have people read them, without the celebrity status or people just in general knowing who you are, then I could too.

As an adult, I have taken my imagination to the next level by using it as a building block for a positive mindset. I use my imagination to envision where I want my life to go. Everything from where I want to vacation, who I want to surround myself with and what I want for my life. I let my mind wander all the time and take my dreams as far as I can. I’ll even dream as I’m walking through a store while shopping. I know that a blog can turn into a business, I’ve seen it with other people. I know that if you surround yourself with people who work just as hard as you or harder, they can be inspiration for you. I know if you choose to go on a vacation where you’ll learn something, like at a conference or master mind, you’ll come home a new person. However, you must do more than just envision, you must do the work. The work can be messy but if you’ve started that’s what’s important. If you try, it means you didn’t give up on yourself. When you put the work in it means you’re determined.

Today, as a 32-year-old woman I close my eyes and see the answers to the vision of my life: the answer is that I can have the life I envision. You have an imagination for a reason, and you were put on this planet for a reason. I believe you were born to live out your vision for your life, all you have to do is start.

Happy Monday Loves! Check out my social media pages on Instagram and Facebook at: Stylestomakeyousmile

Motivational Monday: My Tips for a Positive Morning Mindset

My Tips for a Positive Morning Mindset

I know it can be difficult to get out of bed some mornings, especially on days when you don’t feel like it, don’t feel good or didn’t get a good night’s sleep. For the past five years I would figure out what time I had to leave for work and how long it takes me to get ready which includes eating breakfast, set my alarm for the exact time and get up. During those days I was tired, not wanting to go to work and didn’t start my day on a positive note.

Over the past few years I’ve found several podcasts through Instagram that I enjoy which include-Style Your Mind by Cara Alwill Leyba, Earn Your Happy by Lori Harder, Becoming Fearless by Annie Spano, The Angie Lee Show by Angie Lee and Rise podcast by Rachel Hollis. I began to wake up at the same time every day but would turn on one of these podcasts and listen to them in the morning (and sometimes continued listening on my commute to work). Listening to such inspiring podcasts in the morning made me happy and started my day with a positive mindset. The more I listened to these podcasts the longer I’d want to sit and listen to them in bed. So, I began each morning getting up earlier to eat breakfast in bed while listening to them. I’d finish eating and just sit in bed until I knew I had to get up. While listening in bed, I’d take in everything and think about what their words meant for my own life. The point of any motivational podcast is to be relatable to your own life. I encourage you all to find a podcast you can listen to in the morning that best relates to your life. If you use any of my recommendations, please let me know! I’d love to chat about them! 😊

Other than podcasts, there are some mornings where all I want to do is have a dance party. When I was growing up, I would wake up an hour and a half before the bus came and for much of my morning, I would be in my bedroom with the door closed and blast my boom box (omg I feel old for writing those two words, haha!) playing songs that made me dance. Not much has changed since my childhood of love for music. So, I’ll go YouTube and play songs I love that make me want to get out of bed and dance-like George Michael’s Faith. I listen to everything from 80’s, 90’s and music from my favorite movies, like I Say A Little Prayer for You from My Best Friend’s Wedding (sometimes I’ll find the movie clip and watch it while singing to it). I turn on the song before I even get out of bed. Just hearing the music makes me want to get out of bed to dance. I play songs that make me dance from the time I get out of bed while getting ready until I walk out the door for work then I continue the dance party in my car while driving to work by finding songs I enjoy listening to.

Each morning when I wake up, I can recognize if I’m in the mood for music or to listen to a podcast or both. Most podcasts are under an hour long, so if you wake up early enough you can have time for both. No matter what is going on in my life, listening to podcasts and music always sets the tone for a positive morning. These two things are meant to make you happy and feel good about yourself so that is how you should begin each morning. ❤

Here’s a few more tips I came up with to make your morning positive:
1.Dancing to music 2. Eat Breakfast 3. Get Out of Bed Earlier Than Expected-even if it’s just a half hour 4. Work on your hobby 5. Post something positive to social media for your friends to see.

What makes you start your morning on a positive note? Let me know in the comments below or on social media @stylestomakeyousmile