Featured

Lessons I’ve Learned at 31

This weekend I made a list of the lessons life has taught me at age 31 and I thought I’d share some of them with you all. These lessons I’ve learned have helped me grow into the person I am. I hope they help you grow into the person you want to be no matter what age you are. ❤

Take a break when you need to. Whether it’s from work, school, and your busy schedule or from someone you love. Your body will tell you when you need one-physically or if you’re like me, your mind will be saying, I need a day off to be left alone. When you take that time for yourself, make sure you do things you enjoy to help you recharge.
Your body will change physically. When I was in my late 20’s I found my first gray hair and I now have just a few more 😉 Haha. I’ve always loved to sleep but now I’ve realized getting sleep helps me to function during the day. Having a routine where I go to sleep around the same time each night helps. Certain foods I used to eat I can’t eat anymore because they upset my digestive system, instead find the foods that give you energy.

Write things down as soon as you think of them. This also goes for doing things as soon as you think of them or you may forget until later. Stopping what you’re currently doing to do what you’re thinking of is okay because you’ll remember to go back to what you were doing originally.

It’s okay to do things alone. Just like I learned to go to events alone, see in this post-Learning How to go to Events Alone & Painting Tips Being alone in public is okay. I love going for walks at the park by myself so I can think or not think about anything and just enjoy being outside. I’ve also learned to go to cafes alone so that I can blog.

You’ve probably faced dealing with a friend or family member dying of a disease or sudden death, whether they’ve lived a long life or were a child. Unfortunately, I’ve seen many people I love pass away. The lesson I learned from this is to do what you love before your life is over. The person who passed would be so proud of you for it. Life is too short not live how you want, so if you want to be doing something, go out and make it happen however you can. I know that money can hold people back from their dreams but find small ways to start and go from there.

Everyone in your life is struggling with a battle you may not know anything about until or IF they decide to share. And if they share their struggles it may make you realize why they act the way they do. Things always make sense when you know more information about a person but until you do, don’t judge them, just remind yourself that they may be struggling with something and ask if you can help in any way even if it’s just to talk.

Learning to deal with people who don’t like me has taken most of twenties to deal with. It wasn’t until I found the right people who liked me and appreciated me that I realized who matters. Don’t ever hold yourself back from being great just because someone doesn’t like you or tells you aren’t good enough to do something. DO IT ANYWAY.
Listen to advice. I have always loved reading people’s stories in books and listening to them online/TV. Everyone is on a journey and it may be similar to yours. Their advice may make you realize things about yourself that you need to change (even if someone close to you has been telling you the advice for years, sometimes if you hear it from someone else’s perspective it will click with you).

Confidence is something that I’m working on every single day. I’ve learned that it comes with believing the positive advice/things people say about you, finding a great mentor such as a friend/family member/therapist/coworker and most importantly believing in yourself. Confidence is NOT something that can be forced onto someone, so as much as you’re seeing someone else struggling with confidence, you can give them advice but know that they have to make the choice to be confident on their own.

Travel and go to as many events as possible. Getting out of the house is important and it’s FUN to do new things. Seeing how other people live is important and can put things in your life into perspective. You may even make new friends from going to new places simply because you’re interested in the things they are.

Decide what’s important for your life. People may not agree with your choices or understand what makes you happy but that’s okay.

Put your all into the things and people you love. Starting my blog has given me something to look forward to every day, I believe everyone needs this. Everyone needs people who care about them, so find the ones who do and treat them well.

HAPPINESS IS A CHOICE. Just like I’ve talked about in my blog post, Motivational Monday: Live the Life You Want  you have to live the life you want to live and not listen to judgement, only positivity. Focus on what makes you happy because life’s too short not to.

What are some things you’ve learned at your current age? Please let me know in the comments! ❤

Motivational Monday: The Story of Your Life

The other day I realized that everything and everyone has a story. Every dance you watch is telling a story, a book you read tells a story, every song you hear and out of all of those comes from a person who has lived their story and is able to share it.

Sometimes the reason that people can be so successful is because of the story that they have to share with the world. Being relatable to other’s can help people in so many ways. When it comes to my blog I have always told myself that if I can help at least one person with my content then I’m happy. My content is just a story of the world I live in. The way I see and have seen the world in just a short 31 years. I believe that because everyone has such a different view on the world, you should share what you’ve learned with others and be honest about it. By realizing the value in the story, sharing it can open many doors for you.

I believe that in life people just want to be heard, respected and loved. No one wants to be judged but by putting their story out into the world, but you will be. But by doing so you can connect on an emotional level with so many people. So, don’t be afraid to put yourself out their and share what you’ve learned because you don’t know who you’ll help in the process of sharing your story.

The Style Collective Conference

Joining the Sisterhood of Style Collective has been one of the best decisions I’ve made since starting my blog. Read more HERE on why I joined Style Collective. As soon as I found out Annie, the owner of SC was holding a conference during New York Fashion Week I knew I had to go!

Style Collective has the best community! Right away after joining I met bloggers who I follow, support and talk to weekly. This attributed to wanting to go to the conference because I knew I’d meet more like them and even met a few during conference! It was amazing to be in a room full of women who all have the same likeminded values and goals for their blogs. Meeting the women from SC who I’ve been following on social media was a big deal because these women were exactly who they portray themselves to be online. They were friendly, nice and I got to know them on a personal level.

SCCon1

Being able to hear from speakers who are in the industry is an incredible bonus! Annie had a variety of women speak from influencers, life coaches and an author. These people are here for you to learn from and ask advice. None of the speakers held back on the truth about the blogging industry, they shared the ups and downs. One of the speakers I was dying to meet was Cara Alwill. She’s the author of Like She Owns the Place and has written seven other books, plus has a podcast-Style Your Mind. I’m a huge fan of hers because she’s honest and authentic.

I received a shout out during the opening of the conference from Annie which transferred onto her podcast, The Becoming Fearless podcast. This shows just how close Annie and I were before meeting in person. Annie is amazing in the way she connects with everyone in SC because she truly cares about you and your blog/business.

AnnieAndI

There was a contest during the conference for posting pictures from the day and I won a beautiful blue Mon Amie watch! I love the color, the diamonds and that it’s iridescent. Also, we were provided an amazing swag bag of goodies!! We received everything from jewelry, makeup and skincare products from various vendors.

We received a workbook to write in during the conference. Inside were lined pages to write notes in and a quiz to help you determine the purpose behind your blog. I had written about five pages of notes, jotting down things that I wanted to remember that the speakers said, quotes and important websites to reference.

SCWorkbook

Throughout the day we were able to get our hair and makeup done by Be Glammed. They also gave everyone a gift certificate to use at their stores.

SCCon

At the end of the conference, VIP members were to write a letter to themselves that Annie would mail to us. I literally sat in my chair frozen because I was so emotional. I thought to myself, I NEVER WANT TO FORGET THIS MOMENT. This moment of being happy and doing something for myself that was completely out of my comfort zone-planning a trip to NYC and navigating the city, meeting new bloggers (some I’d been following online for a few months and it was surreal to meet them in person, like they actually exist!), meeting Annie and the speakers and overall having a wonderful NEW experience. I learned in that moment that it feels AMAZING to allow yourself to be apart of new experiences. Yes, it can be scary to put yourself out there, but I met incredible women because I went to conference, so you see the outcome outweighs the stress of going. It can be so easy to freak yourself out by telling yourself all the reasons you shouldn’t do something, but if you just do it I guarantee it will be worth it in the end.

Will you be joining the SC Sisterhood ? I hope to see you at the next conference! Follow me online @stylestomakeyousmile & let me know if you’re an SC Sister and I’ll connect with you 😊

Motivational Monday: Struggle Vs. Success

In a world that is comparison overload between social media and everyone judging each other on how people live, we sometimes only focus on other’s success. What we forget to see is the struggle of how the person got their success. Most success isn’t an overnight thing, people work hard to find success in their life-whether it is with their business, relationship, fitness goals or mental health.

A lot of times we only see the best versions of someone’s life and forget that maybe that person who is currently successful may have struggled. Sometimes people choose to share their struggle and when they do it can make them feel relatable, like maybe you’ve gone through a similar situation. And if they decide to share their life it can make other’s judge them less…hopefully.

So, why do we judge people so hard when they’ve found success? Maybe we shouldn’t. Maybe instead we should see their success is coming from a place of hard work and empowerment. Maybe their success is something they’ve been wanting for themselves for YEARS and couldn’t achieve it until now because they were going through a struggle you know nothing about. You truly don’t know anyone until you’ve seen them behind closed doors. If someone shares their struggle with you and you help them then you are adding to their success, maybe without even realizing it.

Be happy for the one’s who’ve found their success and lift up the one’s who are struggling.

Motivational Monday: Show Up For Yourself

This week I had a very busy week-you know the kind, where the days all blend together and by Friday you don’t even realize it’s Friday, until you’re told so and remember you’ll will have the next two days off and know that the work week is over. You mean next week DOES exist? Yes, it does. This means that the work week will always come to end. Anything you’re dealing with during the week, you can take a two-day break from, you just have to mentally show up for yourself to tell yourself that you deserve a break.

So, here’s what I did this weekend to show up: I worked out, I bought myself a new book called Work Party by Jaclyn Johnson and I read the first four chapters while dressed in a t-shirt, comfy capris, next to an open window with the breeze coming through and listened to life going by outside, I caught up with my friends and family, I planned my entire month of September in my planner-I’d be lost without a planner, I made plans with people I love and let go of the week.

Showing up for yourself mentally just means that you need to allow yourself to work through your emotional and mental process of how your week went and then turning it around by allowing yourself to be okay. Anything that you are dealing with will always end if you let it. If you drag it on in your mind, it will haunt you all weekend, so to move past it, you need to give yourself permission to think about what happened for a certain time then for the rest of the day/weekend tell yourself to move on.

There will always be hard times in life and times when things can be brought up from the past, but it’s how we deal with those times in the present to show up for ourselves that matter the most ❤

Say YES to Treating Yourself

Self-love is one of the best feelings in the world. Why? Because it means you’re making time for yourself. What you put out into the world matters, so if you are feeling like you need some alone time to rejuvenate yourself, you should. Your gut will always tell you when you need a break. I think we’ve all been there, when we’re so stressed out and frustrated with everything going on around us that we just need time away to focus and bring positivity back. When we treat ourselves, it means that we can be our best selves to everyone in our lives.

Some of the ways I’ve said yes to myself this year are: scheduling a weekly workout routine, planning dinners, fueling the body with the food it needs to function properly (I’ve done this by trial and error and I always know when my body is needing something different), sleeping on a normal schedule, waking up early and blogging before going into work, communicating with likeminded women online and taking myself on vacation.

Have you tried any of these as self-care? Have they worked for you?

Say YES to yourself every single day, whether that is by doing one of the things listed above or reading a book or laying in a bath while listening to a podcast or taking a walk. When we take time to drown out what everyone around us is doing and listen to ourselves, you will be able to hear yourself speak about the things you REALLY want to pursue. Once you begin to hear yourself think, GO DO IT. I promise you won’t regret it. Once you unleash your ideas your mind will be focused on how you can create what’s been in your mind all along.

Happy Monday! ❤

Motivational Monday: Don’t Compare, Be Inspired

Do you ever look at what someone else has and think, I wish I had that? Or, I wish I made that amount of money or had that car or that job or lifestyle in general? No matter what anyone else has, YOU can have a great life, too. It may not be exactly what the other person has, but you must work for what you want out of this life.

The simple fact of why no one should compare themselves to anyone is because no one is you. Even if someone else has had the same experience as you, that does not mean they are YOU. Every single person is on a different path than you. Even if someone else did the exact same things as you, that person still speaks and thinks differently.

You never REALLY know what the person you compare yourself to is really going through-their struggles, stress, etc. What that person’s life looks like to you or the outside world may be completely different behind closed doors.
Build your own life. Do things that make you happy and proud because you only get ONE life. Instead of comparing yourself to this person, ask them how they became successful-showing that you admire someone else’s hard work can be very humbling.

Tip: One of the things I love doing is following my favorite influencers on social media-specifically Instagram because they share SO MUCH about their life! They share everything from what they eat, workouts, other influencers/friends they love, to what they did to make themselves successful-even if it’s just changing their mindset.

No one wakes up one day and is successful, it takes time. We must realize that we are all on our own journey and be inspired by others to do the best we can ❤

Happy Monday! Follow me on IG & Facebook at @stylestomakeyousmile

Motivational Monday: Be Fearless

Yesterday, I sat outside and watched two young girls walk up to the top of a waterfall. One climbed to the top of the waterfall quickly, and then fled down waiting for the other girl. The other girl took her time getting to the top, moving carefully, when she got to the top she felt the water and then slowly made her way down and ran to catch up with the other girl.

When I was the girls age (around 10-12), I remember being like the first girl who climbed the waterfall quickly, who had no fear. Around this age my cousin instilled fearlessness in me as he told me he’d only ride roller coasters with me if I were to ride in the front seat. I didn’t want to say no, so I did it and from then on rode the front seat of every. single. rollercoaster. Before I was the girls age, I was very shy. But growing up in the country made me want to explore everything and be fearless.

So, as I sat there yesterday watching the girls I thought, when did I lose that fearlessness? When did I let growing up in this world change my perception from fearless to fearful? The answer: it’s because of all the negative experiences I’ve had personally or have seen happen to others that have made me fearful.

To combat fear, we must change our mindset to know that not every bad experience will replay in our lives. We need to have people in our lives who’ll tell us not to be afraid or we will never be free.

To those young girls, I hope they continue to walk this world fearless even if one is timid than the other-she still followed the fearless girl, which means she can be fearless on her own ❤

Happy Monday!